YOU define yourself...

YOU define yourself...

Beautiful is defined “aesthetically pleasing to your mind and senses.” The crazy thing about that definition is what is aesthetically pleasing to one person may not be for another. Everyone is different and has different views.

One of the problems we have is instead of tapping into ourselves to discover what we personally deem as beautiful we often follow the guidelines that society has set to define beauty. For example, light skinned, big butt, big breasts, long soft hair, six pack, perfectly shaved face and the list goes on.

To clarify, society is “a system of human organizations generating distinctive cultural patterns and institutions and usually providing protection, security, continuity, and a national identity for its members.” Society is a basic commonality of ethics, outlook, and sharing the same geographical or social territory, typically subject to the same political authority and dominant cultural expectations.

For example: Everyone can agree that murder is wrong. We as a society agree upon that ethical principle which was eventually deemed a law that it is illegal to kill people. That is one of the perks of living under democracy. It is pretty much “majority rules.”

The issue when it comes to society and their cultural views is we first have to figure out exactly who “they” are??? And who gets to say that what “their" perception of beauty is correct.

Believe it or not WE make up society. Each and every one of us. We take our views, opinions, and concerns to our local leaders who then passes them on to our state government until a law is passed or not.

I feel like we hesitate making decisions because we are sometimes afraid of what they may think. And when I say they I mean parents, grandparents, peers, everyone who makes up society.

I used to be that way! I did not wear my hair a certain way, wear a certain item, and most importantly say what was on my mind, because I was in fear of what “people” may say. I did not want to be seen, perceived, or thought of a certain way so I always held back. It took 25 years for me to finally walk in my true natural beauty and it is the best feeling ever.

Not everyone is going to think you are beautiful. Not everyone is going to agree with your views and opinions. Reason why is because EVERYONE is different. Everyone has had a different upbringing, experienced different life changing events which shaped the person they are. And it is okay! There is no blueprint to beauty!

My whole point is to advise you to not take everything personal. It is okay to disagree. Be sure of yourself. YOUR beauty, YOUR style, YOUR thoughts, YOUR CONFIDENCE is what makes you, YOU and there will NEVER be another.

It is my desire for everyone to recognize their beauty, worth, and purpose on this earth! Once we realize that, we can take the necessary steps to live and love each other in peace and harmony.


Forever a Lādē,

Tamara L. Wallace






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